The First 30 Days: A Former Admissions Officer’s Advice for College Freshmen Settling In

This is Part 2 of my series on navigating the big transition to college. Parents, start here: The Quiet House: Navigating the Emotional Whirlwind of Freshman Drop‑Off. Students, this one’s for you.

The First Month Is a Rollercoaster, And That’s Normal

"The dorm is quiet now, but it won’t be for long. The first 30 days are about learning how to find your rhythm in a brand-new world."

You’re not failing, you’re adjusting.

I know it feels strange right now. You’re in a new place, with new people, trying to figure out how to carry your whole life in a backpack. You wake up some mornings and wonder if you made the right choice.

“I really focused on Gideon and this being Gideon’s moment, managing my emotions so he could have this moment — and it worked.”— Ronnie Burnett, Admissions Beat S6E6

I’ve seen thousands of students take this leap. As an admissions officer, I watched them go from unsure to unstoppable. And as a mom, I watched my own son make the same climb. Take a breath. The first 30 days are just the first chapter.

Give Yourself Permission to Feel Everything

One morning you might wake up convinced you picked the wrong school. By evening, you’re laughing with friends like you’ve known them for years. That emotional whiplash? Totally normal.

We talked on the podcast about how students who try to power through without acknowledging their feelings often make the transition harder on themselves. It takes courage to say, “I’m homesick” or “This is harder than I thought.”That honesty is what moves you forward.

Create Structure Before You Feel Settled

When everything feels unfamiliar, even small routines can be life rafts.

“It’s still Gideon, but Gideon 2.0. I see such a change in him even now — the independence he’s had.”— Ronnie Burnett, Admissions Beat S6E6

Find a dining hall schedule that works. Claim a favorite study spot. Go for a walk at the same time every evening. These tiny habits signal to your brain: I belong here. This is home now.

Learn to Ask Questions, Even When It’s Hard

When I started my first job after college, I was terrified to admit when I didn’t understand something. I’d nod along and scramble to figure it out later. Spoiler: that strategy doesn’t work.

“Asking questions isn’t weakness — it’s how you build confidence.”

College professors, RAs (or JAs), classmates, they expect you to be unsure at first. Raise your hand. Go to office hours. Say, “I don’t get it, can you explain?”The sooner you start, the faster you’ll grow.

Say Yes to New Experiences, But Also Say No

You might get invitations to a hundred things: club fairs, late-night study sessions, spontaneous road trips. Saying yes helps you explore. But saying no helps you recharge.

But here’s the truth…maybe you’re not getting a flood of invites yet. Maybe you’re still figuring out how to find your people or where to even start. That’s okay, too. Everyone’s timeline for connection looks different.

Start small: attend one campus event, join one group chat, strike up one conversation in the dining hall. It doesn’t have to happen all at once.

“The first month isn’t about finding your forever people — it’s about gathering data on what makes you feel alive here.”

Balance is key. Push your comfort zone a little, then listen to your gut when it says, I need a night in.

Stay Connected Without Staying Tied

Your parents are probably resisting the urge to text you hourly. (Trust me, I’m one of them.) Give them grace, but give yourself space, too.

A quick call once or twice a week can keep you connected without keeping you tethered. And try this: send them an actual postcard. You’d be surprised how much joy it brings on both ends.

A Final Word: You’re Already Becoming

This time next month, you won’t believe how much has changed. You’ll have a routine, a few favorite spots, maybe even a few people who feel like “your people.”

And your parents? They’re back home, learning how to let go — just as you’re learning how to stand taller.

“It’s still Gideon, but Gideon 2.0. I see such a change in him even now — the independence he’s had.”— Ronnie Burnett, Admissions Beat S6E6

You don’t have to rush. You don’t have to have it all figured out. Just keep showing up. Every awkward conversation, every new step, is building a life that’s uniquely yours.

Back to Part 1

The Quiet House: Navigating the Emotional Whirlwind of Freshman Drop‑Off

Want to hear more about this adjustment? Listen to the conversation on Dartmouth’s Admissions Beat podcast [here].